So, there was a maus in our hotel room. As I watched it scurry away to hide and stared at the trash can it dawned on me that this was why the trash can was so small. They were trying to prevent you from attracting mice! 

Amanda handed me a laundry bag from the Prestige Inn and I whipped it over top of the garbage can, tied it up, and toted the whole package out to the common room where I left it by the larger trash can. I’m sure the cleaning people the next day wondered why someone threw away their trash can. 

We mouse-proofed the room then slept with one eye open all night. The next morning I went to the office and was given a discount and told a mousetrap would be brought to our room. The workers at this lodge were very nice and I was happy with the customer service. 

After cashing in our coupons for a free breakfast at the restaurant below our room, which was delicious, we began the day with a hike at Maligne Canyon. The map signage for this hike was ultra-confusing and everyone was starting the trail with a shrug and an “if we get lost, we get lost” attitude. 

I liked this hike. There were six bridges, and we hiked across four of them. The fifth and sixth are farther away, so we opted not to visit those. This canyon was kind of a glorified Clifton Gorge and it felt like it could have been in Ohio. 

Next, we went to Pyramid Lake. On a whim, we rented kayaks! It cost us $45 CAD ($34 USD) for an hour’s rental, which is a steal in this part of the world. The guy in the rental place said, “The main attraction of Jasper is that it’s not Banff.” Truer words have never been spoken.

 As we kayaked away from the beach, I heard the cry of a loon in the distance. Soon, I spotted the loons, and a couple of them floated right by my kayak. It was amazing to be so close. 

After this bit of fun, we headed into the town of Jasper to go to a gift shop and get some A&W which is seemingly in every town in Canada. After a couple false starts, we finally located the official Jasper National Park gift shop and I spent like $25 buying some postcards and bookmarks 😩. Did I mention the gift shops were expen$ive? 

At A&W, I ordered poutine, which is apparently a Canadian delicacy? It was fries with Aunt Cheryl’s turkey gravy and some cheese curds. It tasted exactly like fries with gravy and cheese curds.

We ate our food at the lodge and checked the mousetrap only to find it empty. 

Next, we headed to the Edith Cavell region and hit up the Path of the Glacier trail. This was a steep yet paved trail and it had begun to rain. For some reason, my lungs failed me on this hike and I was struggling. The good news is that there weren’t too many people around to witness my huffing and puffing. The glacier and lake we viewed at the end of the trail were beautiful. When we got back to the car, we were freezing and wet, but we decided we had enough energy for one last hike in Jasper – the Valley of the Five Lakes. Before the trip, I’d declared that this hike looked stupid and I didn’t want to do it. But, it had been a good day, so I ended up suggesting that we go ahead and do the hike 

The hike began placid enough, and there were people on the trail. We came to a hill and as we ascended, some old people were coming down and one woman said, “I wonder how Debbie’s hips are doing on this trail?”

Debbie’s hips became our rallying cry as we found that this trail had more up and down than we’d bargained for – and was nigh on deserted. I kept noticing black stuff on the trail and finally at one point I picked up a branch covered in it and studied it. It was wiry, black hair. I knew that it was black bear hair/fur, but I wasn’t too bothered for some reason. We saw about seven lakes on this trail, the Canadians were up to their old tricks when they named this one. Some of the lakes were green as a four leaf clover, which was strange. We found some Red Chairs and I critiqued their placement, the better view was the opposite direction. 

Towards the end of the hike, there were some people. Two guys were taking photos of a loon on the lake as if their lives depended on it. It was very strange. There were also some more random Europeans: about five teens taking photos of an old guy and an old woman.  

We finished the hike without encountering a bear and headed back to our hotel. We ordered to-go food from the restaurant because I had some Canadian cash I wanted to blow through. The waitress gave us our order and told us not to worry about returning the silverware…and it wasn’t plastic silverware. (We returned it.) After dinner, we wandered around the property and were told by some friendly Americans that they saw some grizzly bears wander through the cabin area that afternoon. We had literally come back for lunch at 2:00 that afternoon. We must have just missed the bears again. This guy told us, “If you wait long enough, you’ll see stuff.” I decided we must be too impatient or just plain bad at spotting wildlife, and I’ve resigned myself to never seeing a bear outside the zoo. I guess I can say I handled bear hair on the trail. (Derek later confirmed that’s what it was I was seeing.)

In the night we were awoken to a scratching noise and found that Jerry had made his way into the trap. It was a live trap. We turned out the lights and he started making a racket trying to escape. “Shh!” Amanda said, and he stopped for 2.5 seconds. After a while, I whisper shouted, “Shh! ShH! SHHHHH!” and he ignored me. We ended up turning on the bathroom light and that shut him up for the rest of the night. 

Of course I checked my phone during this and saw that there was a tornado warning at Derek’s house heading for my house. So, I began trying to call people over wifi and make sure everyone was safe. Once it was confirmed that they were, I threw my face into the pillow and blacked out until morning. 

After watching Jerry claw at the prison walls for a bit, we went down for our free breakfast. I ordered the Belgian Waffles and was blown away by how good they were. The Tekarra Lodge: mousey, but one of my favorite hotels ever. 

Our time in Canada was coming to a close. We began our drive back to Calgary down the Icefields Parkway. We stopped in Banff, and I felt like a fish out of water. Finally, we left the Rocky Mountains and I was happy to see a wide open sky again. Soon, we were at our hotel, the Acclaim Inn. We went to church. Then, we dropped off the rental car and shuttled back to our hotel where we donned the provided Fresh White Robes, and watched a movie. 

At 4:00 the next morning we arose, gathered our stuff, got on the shuttle, and experienced the inefficiency of the Canadian people at its finest at Calgary Airport Security. These agents were policing the most minor of things – but you didn’t have to take your shoes off. You could pretty much tell who was American in line, because they were the ones rolling their eyes and shaking their heads at the insanity. 

We finally got through the line – Amanda a few liquids lighter, because it’s apparently super important that you fit your liquids into a quart-sized ziplock bag- then found our gate. It took them about 45 minutes to get the plane boarded because, once again, they’re inefficient. The gate woman weirdly forced me to sign my passport but was trying to take my pen away from me the entire time I was signing. 

We got on the plane and the flight was fine until we began our descent. It was very bumpy and disturbing. Once we landed, we made our way through the maze of the Toronto Airport, went through security again, went through Customs Pre-Clearance, and, tired, hungry, and headachy, parked ourselves at the gate for our plane to Columbus. Soon enough we boarded and I couldn’t have asked for a smoother flight. I was watching the monitor that showed where we were and once we crossed Lake Erie – you could taste the freedom in the air. 

We landed effortlessly, walked down the stairs and across the tarmac, found our parents, and drove home. God Bless America.